


Hard coding

by voculae (northernMagic)



Series: Contrary to popular belief: drabbles from the workplace [11]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Computer Code, Computer Programming, Drabble, Experimental Style, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Poetry, Pseudocode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-04 23:29:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11565615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/northernMagic/pseuds/voculae
Summary: if Bond.returnedEquipment == True:for intactPiece in equipment:Q.kiss(Bond)





	Hard coding

**Author's Note:**

> Pseudocode is the logic of a computer program written to be human-readable. It's not written in a particular computer language, and omits irrelevant or obvious details. There's no standard way of writing pseudocode, but some conventions include "//" to mean everything on that line is a comment or not executed, and indented lines to indicate nested code. I've taken many artistic liberties to emphasize the feels at the expense of rigorous program logic and convention.

**Q:**

 

     fitnessAppAlpha( ):

          while Bond.status == ‘mia’:

               appOutput.display( Bond.vitals ).refresh( 60 )

 

     satelliteCalibration( ):

          while Bond.status == ‘mia’:

               calibrationLog.display( faceSearch( Bond )).refresh( 3600 )

 

     vow( ):

          if Bond.isAmenable:

               if Bond.returnedEquipment == True:

                    for intactPiece in equipment:

                         Q.kiss( Bond )

 

**Bond:**

_// This class is deprecated. Please use the new 007 class instead._

 

     private isAmenable = True

     private home = Q

 

     sendPostcard( home ):

 _//_ _Postcard( home ).write( “Wish you were here” )_

 _//_ _Postcard( home ).write( Bond.isAmenable )_

 _//_ _Postcard( home ).write("")_

          return

 

     resurrect( ):

          try:

               retire( )

               return home

          except:

               for everyEnemy in threatsToQ:

                    eliminateEnemy( )

               retire( )

               return home

 

          except:

               if Bond.currentAge ≤ retirementAge:

                    retire( )

               return home

 

     retire( ):

          // …

          Q.kiss( Bond )

 

**Author's Note:**

> You can find the original version I wrote of this poem at my writing Tumblr voculae.
> 
> Feel free to remix this or any of my other works (with attribution) and drop a link back to me (voculae on tumblr).

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Initiate stress baking.exe](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11622246) by [Linorien](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linorien/pseuds/Linorien)




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